Speckled
by Muttsuri
Summary: When he sees the two together, he looks away, reminding himself that he’s their friend. Watanuki finds out that it’s alright to leave the floor undusted. DoumekixWatanuki.


**Disclaimer:** HOLiC is owned by CLAMP.

**Author's Notes:** My first attempt at a HOLiC one-shot. I got inspired while reading volumes seven and eight, hence the derivation of the lines. Pairings include DoumekixWatanuki, one-sided WatanukixHimawari, and implied DoumekixHimawari. Doumeki and Watanuki are just too cute together. I have nothing against Himawari, and don't worry, there is no bashing in this fic (I hate bashing). I actually like the way Himawari 'supports' her two friends, haha. This story is also based on Watanuki's perspective, but it's a third person point of view. So, enjoy reading, and, um, it'd make me really happy if you took a moment to comment.

**Warning:** There is shounen-ai (boyxboy love) in this story. If you don't like that, then please don't read.

**Spoilers:** Spoilers for the aftermath of the Spider's Grudge arc.

**Notes:** Don't forget to read the italicized quotes. They are connected to the subsequent texts.

* * *

-

**Speckled**

**-**

* * *

-

"_And the moment those words left her lips, my heart would undoubtedly stop completely!"_

_-- Watanuki about Himawari, Volume 8 page 160_

-

When Himawari had frowned, apologized, and had uttered words which resembled: "I like someone else", Watanuki had entertained the idea of jumping out of the window.

It hurt, _undoubtedly_, but he had already been prepared for the worst. Even though Watanuki felt like he wouldn't live any further – he would just cripple, and die an agonizing death from the pain he was feeling – the words that Himawari had said didn't feel like the _worst_, although it was an outright rejection.

Even when Himawari had asked him about the person _she_ likes, Watanuki didn't feel that _those_ words – _"What do you think I should do, Watanuki-kun? I like him very much." _- were the worst. He had quelled the ache in his chest, and had said that she should act on her feelings. He'd even gone so far as encourage her to confess to the guy, and he'd even told her _tips_ on how to do so.

Watanuki couldn't forget the day that Himawari had confessed. When he had asked her how the confession went, she had answered cheerfully, eyes shining bright.

"He offered to walk me home later."

He couldn't forget that day, because out of all the words that Himawari had said ever since he had confessed to her, _those_ words were worst.

The afternoon on the day of her confession, after classes had ended, Watanuki had found himself walking home alone. Both of his closest friends were missing.

-

"_But wasn't your eyesight originally worse, Watanuki?"_

_-- Yuuko, Volume 8 page 121_

-

Watanuki was frequently seeing Himawari.

He would see her soft glistening hair, and her pale beautiful face. He'd get glimpses of her charming smile, and see her laughing so joyously. He would often see her, even if it's just the top of her head, the back of her uniform, or even just her smooth hand.

He was seeing her a lot, but without her knowledge.

Watanuki was glad that half of his vision was full of Himawari. Although he honestly wasn't sure if he was happy with _what it meant_.

-

"_You see too much now."_

_-- Yuuko to Watanuki, Volume 8 page 121_

-

He noticed the shy smiles, the _timed_ stolen glances, the seemingly casual brushing of hands when they taught no one was looking. He noticed the tension when they were close to each other, could swear that there was electricity flying about when they were near. There were always hushed whispers and small giggles from her, and amused grunts and small smiles from him. The usual break for eating became a break for imperceptible _flirting_.

Watanuki notices all of this, and so much _more_.

-

"_He sees too much and now he's in trouble!"_

_-- Mokona, Maru, and Moro about Watanuki, Volume 8 page 121_

-

Watanuki didn't do it intentionally. He had forgotten a text book on his desk, and had gone back to school to retrieve it. He had entered his classroom, quickly opening the door and intending to get out just as fast, when his gaze had fallen on two familiar figures.

By the corner of the room, sunlight basking them in an orange glow, Doumeki and Himawari stood beside each other. The archer's right arm was around Himawari's shoulders, and Himawari's head was nestled on Doumeki's chest. They looked relaxed, happy, and contented.

They looked perfect.

The warning bells inside Watanuki's head said that he wasn't supposed to see what he was currently seeing. But he knew that the warning came late because a gasp had already escaped his lips, and when two pairs of eyes had looked at his direction, he just knew that he was in trouble somewhat.

-

"_She called it fun! That must mean she considers being with me as something good!"_

_-- Watanuki about Himawari, Volume 8 page 26_

-

Himawari clapped her hands in a gesture of merriment. "That was fun!" she said, smiling.

Doumeki nodded in agreement, his lips curving at the sides.

Watanuki, however, remained silent. He didn't want to interrupt the two by pointing out that they were just walking home from school like usual. He wasn't stupid; he knew his cue whenever moments like these occurred – and they were occurring a lot since he found out about _them_. His cue entailed that he must not utter a single word, basically turning mute _and _blind, while they gaze deeply into each other's eyes.

He quietly watched as Himawari said a gentle "take care" with a blush on her cheeks, and felt his stomach churning when Doumeki's smile grew a fraction wider and said "you too" in a tender whisper.

If _this_ was 'fun', Watanuki knew that he needed to redefine his adjectives.

-

"_There is something… Watanuki must understand for himself."_

_-- Yuuko, Volume 8 page 41_

-

There was something wrong with him, Watanuki rationalized.

Because when he sees Doumeki and Himawari together, he would get annoyed. If he sees them talking without him, he would see red and get angry. If he sees them touching each other – lightly, casually, intentionally, and _accidentally_ – he would get frustrated. And when he sees them smiling at each other, he feels his stomach tightening, and his emotions are all tangled.

Jealousy was a hideous feeling, and Watanuki knew that the wrongness in him was this sin.

There was something definitely wrong with him, he knew, because it is when Doumeki smiles at Himawari, and not the other way around as he had originally thought, that he was actually and genuinely envious.

-

"_There's something I learned from it."_

_-- Watanuki, Volume 8 page 104_

-

He's aware of their closeness, their proximity. He could count the number of inches that separated their bodies, and the _centimeters_ of gap between their faces. He could hear his heart throbbing in the background, and it going _boom-boom!-BOOM!_ when Doumeki inched closer. He could feel his hand _wanting_ to touch the pale face before him, caress it to his hand's own satisfaction. His fingers ached to run across the archer's shining black tresses. And his mouth wanted to taste that soft, soft unblemished skin, and needed to close the distance between their lips.

His vision turned blurry even with his glasses on. His eyes fluttered close. His breath hitched, and slowed, until it stopped the moment that Doumeki reached out.

Watanuki's eyes snapped open. His gaze followed Doumeki's hand as it took the fallen broom, the one that Watanuki had dropped when he saw Doumeki so close to him. He could hear the taller teen mumbling, "Idiot, you scattered the dirt all over the place," under his breath. Watanuki frowned.

He couldn't deny it any longer, he learned just mere seconds ago - he had feelings for his rival, the person he wanted to strangle the most.

-

"_The less I pay attention to it, the less it actually affects me."_

_-- Watanuki about his vision, Volume 7 page 127_

-

His blue eyes looked at the merging hues of oranges and violets that painted the sky. He could faintly hear his two friends talking with each other like they've never talked before, but he turned that into a buzz, and soon into an incoherent murmur. Instead, he focused his attention to the path they were walking towards home, and thought about more important things – like the sidewalk, or the trash bin outside of the big house, or the bird singing horribly and off-tune near them. He preferred the bird's singing, however, more than the conversation beside him.

He thought about his dinner, or lack there of. He thought about school, the books he was carrying, and even his boring teacher. He thought about Yuuko, and realized that this was the first time he had anticipated going to work. He missed cleaning his boss' house – it took his mind off _things_. He turned his attention to the swaying tree, and the strong breeze lifting and ruffling his hair. He closed his eyes as strands of black hair crossed his vision. He opened them, and saw Himawari clutching Doumeki's arm for support, and the archer holding her like she's the most precious person in the world, as the wind messed their balance.

Watanuki turned his head and looked away. He walked as fast as he could towards the opposite direction, even though he knew that this route led him far away from Yuuko's house or even his apartment. He didn't say "goodbye", and didn't wait for his friends' own. He didn't even wait for them to notice that he was already gone, and he doubted that they will.

-

"_I'm fine with the way I am."_

_-- Watanuki to Doumeki, Volume 7 page 150_

-

Tonight, cleaning didn't take his mind off things. Watanuki learned this as he repeatedly cleaned the already spotless floor.

Doumeki and Himawari were his friends, first and foremost. Even if he had feelings for Himawari before, and unwanted feelings for his annoying-but-grudgingly-admitted-that-he-was-handsome rival, he shouldn't be against their 'relationship'. He should be happy for them. He should _not_ want to pull them far away from each other every chance he got. He was their _friend_, and he was fine with that. They're happy, Watanuki's happy that they're happy, end of story.

He heard a throat being cleared behind him, and he raised his head to look. He found Yuuko staring at him with narrowed eyes.

"You know," she began in her usual cryptic voice, "Sometimes, it's better when the floor is speckled with dirt."

Watanuki instantly stopped scrubbing the floor. "What?" he asked confusedly. She didn't want him to clean the floor?

Yuuko suddenly laughed with screeching volumes, her eyebrows raised. "And I would extract that from your payment. Oh ho ho ho ho!"

"I didn't even understand what you said!" Watanuki's eyebrows drew together. He exclaimed, "I don't even know what it was for!"

"You'll know soon enough." The tall woman turned and left, an amused smile gracing her lips.

-

"_I'm _not_ fine with it."_

_-- Doumeki to Watanuki, Volume 7 page 150_

-

Doumeki grabbed his shoulder, and Watanuki felt a shiver passing through him from the contact.

"What's wrong?" Doumeki asked. When Watanuki turned to face the archer, he found his rival narrowing his eyes.

Watanuki brushed the hand on his shoulder away. An annoyed expression was present on his face. "Nothing's wrong," he said as normally as he could, showing much of the irritation he felt. He didn't want Doumeki near him, fearing that he might do things that he'll regret.

Doumeki crossed his arms. "When we see each other on the hall, you turn back and head towards the other direction. When we eat lunch, you eat and leave so fast, saying that you have to do some errand. And when classes are finished, you just disappear without saying goodbye."

He added, "It's a miracle that I happened to catch up with you here in the toiletries. You left your lunch lying near us _without eating it_." He creased his eyebrows, silently saying that Watanuki always ate his homemade lunch no matter what.

"Something's wrong. You're avoiding me," Doumeki accused.

Watanuki huffed. At the start of their lunch break, he saw Doumeki and Himawari holding hands, and he just felt his appetite going away. That was all there to it, really.

"I am _not_ avoiding you! Don't flatter yourself into thinking that I even consider you worthy of my attention." He smirked. In truth, Doumeki consumed his attention 24/7, but he would rather die than say that aloud.

Doumeki didn't seem contented with Watanuki's answer because he unfolded his arms, and shoved the other teen hard against the nearest wall, slightly hissing, "Then _what_ is your problem?"

-

"_I hope that nothing bad comes of it."_

_-- Watanuki about the photo, Volume 7 page 70_

-

The last thing Watanuki remembers is that he was gazing into fiery amber orbs, thinking that they were one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen, and the next thing he knows is that those eyes were looking at him in shock.

Watanuki was surprised too, but that came a few seconds later, after he had tasted Doumeki's lips. His mind registered that they taste _nice_, and it was like tasting the wind and the smell of the morning dew from the trees - if one can taste smells.

Then his mind registered what he had done, and he quickly pulled back. His blue eyes stared back at equally surprised ones. A few seconds later, Watanuki was scrambling far, far away from the toiletries, thanking all gods he knew that Doumeki wasn't in his class.

-

"_Make sure you've got club next time, too! Even better, make sure you've got club everyday!!"_

_-- Watanuki to Doumeki, Volume 8 page 24_

-

All throughout his classes, Watanuki had been thinking about what had happened during lunchtime. It was the most idiotic thing he had ever done. Who ever heard of a person kissing his rival, her former crush's possible boyfriend? He wanted to smack himself, and beat some sense into his mind. He possibly destroyed what small amount of friendship he had with Doumeki.

At the same time, he didn't want to trade anything in the world in exchange for the kiss. It was the most exhilarating thing he had ever experienced. Doumeki's lips tasted great - more than what he had imagined and dreamed about night after night.

"Watanuki-kun!"

Watanuki turned to see Himawari running up to him. He smiled, despite his mind screaming at him: '_You traitor! You kissed the person she likes!'_. He reasoned to his mind that _he_ liked Doumeki too.

When Himawari beckoned for him to start heading home, Watanuki couldn't stop voicing out his thoughts. He _had_ to ask, "Where's Doumeki?"

The pig-tailed girl frowned, and looked disappointed. "He's got club," she explained. "He said that there's a tournament coming up."

Watanuki vaguely heard his inner voice saying to him that he screwed everything up, because he was sure that the next archery tournament was not due for another five months.

-

"_You're just in time! Help out."_

_-- Doumeki to Watanuki about cleaning the temple, Volume 7 page 9_

-

Four days passed, and Himawari repeatedly told Watanuki that Doumeki had club every afternoon, missing out on their usual walking-home trips. Each day that Himawari told him the same excuse, Watanuki felt like dirt. He had soiled his relationship with a friend - a rival, but a friend still. They probably are not even rivals anymore, Watanuki sullenly thought.

Saturday came, and Watanuki saw Himawari walking along the park alone. He was quick to notice Doumeki's absence, and he inquired about it. Himawari tapped her chin with a finger, thought for a moment, and then answered him in a plain voice, "He told me that he had to practice archery."

At that point, Watanuki had enough. He couldn't believe that Doumeki had archery even on Saturdays. Doumeki didn't even train that much when he had that super hard tournament before. His left eye twitched, and he quickly muttered an "I have to go" to Himawari before he walked away.

Doumeki wasn't a coward, Watanuki knew. He was his rival, _damn it_, and as Watanuki's rival, Doumeki _wouldn't, couldn't, shouldn't_ back out from anything. As his rival, Watanuki would find the stupid archer right now, and help him by putting some sense into his mind.

-

"_You want to help clean up the temple again? The broom's right over there."_

_-- Doumeki to Watanuki, Volume 7 page 135_

-

Watanuki found Doumeki outside of the temple, sweeping the place with a broom. Doumeki looked the same, as if nothing happened that caused him to 'practice' archery all week long. Watanuki felt the urge to smack the taller teen, and ask him or scream at him about what his problem was, or even kiss him senseless. He didn't act on any of his urges, but instead he casually strolled in and stood a few feet away from Doumeki, stopping himself from fidgeting.

"Himawari-chan said that you were practicing archery," Watanuki stated, looking at the broom in Doumeki's hand.

Doumeki stiffened when he heard Watanuki, but he resumed sweeping after a beat. "I was practicing before you came." He avoided looking at Watanuki, and it was obvious to the bespectacled teen.

An awkward silence followed, and Watanuki didn't know what to do. He couldn't very well shout that he liked the other boy, or tell him to stop sweeping and just kiss him again. But when he noticed that Doumeki was sweeping the same spot over and over again, he knew that he had to fix the problem he had caused first.

"It's funny. Now it's you that's avoiding me," Watanuki said wryly, a humorless smile on his lips.

Doumeki stopped sweeping again, and slowly looked at Watanuki with troubled eyes. The expression he had made Watanuki want to bury himself on the spot.

"You," Doumeki started, frustration evident on his voice, "Just tell me why you did it."

This made Watanuki blush furiously, and he started stuttering under Doumeki's intense gaze. There was no mistaking what 'it' was. "Wha-What I-I er…" He coughed, and the image of him kissing the other boy flooded his mind. He reminded himself that he was here to fix everything and get things straight.

"About that," he began, looking away, "I want to-" He coughed again. "I want to apologize. I know I shouldn't have done that and-" _Himawari_. Watanuki remembered Himawari smiling. He remembered her asking about Doumeki. He remembered giving her tips that probably started _everything_.

"You know what?" Watanuki raised his hand in a stop motion, and then made a shooing gesture with it. "Just forget it. Pretend it didn't happen, okay?"

Watanuki turned and started walking away. Just what was he thinking, coming here and trying to fix things? There was nothing to fix in the first place. He was really an _idiot_. Doumeki and Himawari were meant to be with each other. Watanuki started everything, and he should be the one to end it. And to do that, he had to accept that his two friends were happy being with one another, even if Watanuki didn't entirely like it.

A hand grabbed his wrist with enough force to stop and turn him around. Before Watanuki could flail and utter a protest, he found that familiar pair of lips brushing his forehead gently. The act of it being gentle and not being on his lips were the things that made it so surprising, and made Watanuki baffled.

"Idiot," Doumeki whispered, drawing away from Watanuki. "Kunogi made everything up, saying she wanted to 'help Watanuki-kun and Doumeki-kun become one in heart'." An imperceptible pink tinged his cheeks, and he looked away. "Took you long enough to make up your mind," he muttered.

The archer cleared his throat. "You're here to help clean again? The other broom's right over there." He pointed to the tree by the shrine, and went back to the place he originally was standing, resuming to clean again with the broom in his hand.

Watanuki could only nod in a daze. He could still feel the tingling sensation on his forehead, and it was making him dizzy. He went to get the said broom, and started sweeping silently without thoughtful direction.

When Doumeki's words finally registered in his mind a few sweeping moments later, Watanuki growled loudly, stomped his foot, and ungracefully threw the broom he was holding to one smirking Doumeki. The specks of dust flittered and shrouded them in grayish array, but for once, they didn't mind getting dirty.

* * *

-

**End**

-

* * *

**AN:** I know I should be doing my other fic, but this one continued to bug me until I finally relented. I'm tired of fics ending with the typical shared kiss, or exchanged "I like you" between the two characters, and I think it would out of character for Doumeki and Watanuki to do those things. So, I hope you liked the way this story ended, and I hope you enjoyed reading this because I seriously had fun writing it. Himawari being the supportive type is just too fun, and DouWata forever. 


End file.
